Not for Pinks or the Unsaved: SUBGENIUS MEMBERS-ONLY FORUM: SCRUBGENIUS

There is now a Members-only Internet forum for True SubGenii on Google Groups, called ScrubGenius.

For decades -- since 1986 in fact -- alt.slack on Usenet was the main SubGenius forum. Unfortunately, because it was unmoderated, it acted also as a kind of "kook flypaper," and in recent years it began to draw so many -- er, how to put this? Our formerly great newsgroup is now about 90% what we might call unbelievers, Pink Boys, the Differently Saned, unfunny but overactive Bobbies, obsessive spurned fanboys, occultist ninnies who claim they're Dobbs or God, racist psychos and other "Bob"less paranoid PinKooks. Most of the "Rev. Ivan Stangs" that post there are not the real one, for instance, and (sorry to disappoint you) none of the so-called "Bobs" there are the One True J. R. "Bob" Dobbs.

Thousands of SubGenii are now using Facebook, initially meeting via the two official pages, CHURCH OF THE SUBGENIUS and SUBGENIUS FOUNDATION.

ALT.SLACK REPLACEMENT:

Our friend Rev. Tater Gumfries started SCRUBGENIUS, a new Members Only forum on Google Groups. Any DUES-PAYING $30 SubGenius minister can join, but anybody can be thrown out too. So, for the finest in kookery and kook-bashing, by all means see good old alt.slack. But for the unsullied SubGenius news, gossip and interaction, try:

http://groups.google.com/group/scrubgenius

You will have to join Google Groups -- most people probably already have -- which costs nothing, and you will then apply to join ScrubGenius. You must give your "human name" -- the one you first ordered your Membership under -- or otherwise give us something to look up in our records, like a physical or email address that we would have from your order.

ScrubGenius is where you'll find chatty posts, caustic humor, inner-church secrets and old-school rants by such long-time SubGenii as Rev. Stang, Rev. Susie the Floozie, Dr. Legume etc.

An Urgent Suggestion - VOTE (and some news)

On behalf of myself and no one else, I urge my fellow U.S.A. citizens to heed the message of last night's Hour of Slack show, and get out and vote on Tuesday. Sure, the System's broken, blah blah woof woof, but just listen to the careful reasoning (and readings from the SubGenius-Only forum, ScrubGenius) and give it some thought. But do it before Tuesday night.

Hour of Slack #1281 -- Live: Halloween Monster / November Election Special

"After some choice clips from past shows and collages concerning the world of monsters and politics, we continue to explore that theme, live in the studio, with Lonesome Cowboy Dave, Princess Wei 'R.' Doe, and Rev. Ivan Stang on blabberlips. We try not to get too clearly or overtly political on Hour of Slack, but in this particular episode, Rev. Stang lets out some steam that he has evidently been holding in for some time. Learn why The Monsters Are Coming to Maple Street and how to stop them."

On SubSITE: 2010 NYC Devival Reports, Photos, Audio of the Whole Show

"X-DAY IN WONDERLAND"

That's what Princess Wei called this devival, because it really was like a good chunk of X-Day Drill at its best, only indoors. From my point of view it was one of the best devivals ever, on all counts. Turnout was great, venue was great, performances were great, sales were great, and best of all, unlike X-Day, I wasn't in charge. All I HAD to do was rant and perform a wedding!

You can hear/download the whole thing from the above-linked page. If you want you can also read an unreasonably detailed photo report by Princess Wei and myself about the quaintliness and quaintitudes we encountered on our road trip across Pennsylvania to and from the devival.

CULT CREATION & MANAGEMENT

And

THE SECRET HISTORY OF THE CHURCH OF THE SUBGENIUS

(scroll down to the SubGenius course by Stang)

The online class is in its fourth year at Maybe Logic Academy. We started on Oct. 25, but it lasts 6 weeks and all of the materials -- 3 data-DVDs worth of video, audio and documents (like all the STARK FISTS) from the early days of the Church until now -- are available the whole time. We're really just starting, and if you join now you won't have missed anything. Even the daily live chats are archived.

Nov. 13 -- Detroit Devival

With THE AMINO ACIDS, Rev. Ivan Stang, much more.

9 pm at Old Miami, 3930 Cass Ave., Detroit, MI

Facebook Page

TWO MAJOR SUBGENIUS EVENTS IN OCTOBER: NYC DEVIVAL Oct. 9 and MAYBE LOGIC ACADEMY'S 6-WEEK ONLINE SUBGENIUS CLASS - OCT. 25 - DEC.12

One requires you to go to New York City; the other lets you download hundreds of hours of audio, video and graphics while ensconced at home.

You are more likely to pick up an attractive stranger at the NYC event. Therefore, we urge you to do BOTH.

The powerful Go F--- Yourself Clench of NYC is bringing top SubGenius preachers and bands, and Dobbs only knows what else, to the fabulous Wonderland in Astoria, to entertain you to within an inch of your life. Preachers include Rev. Ivan Stang, Rev. Susie the Floozie, Rev. Bleepo Abernathy, Priestess Pisces, Pope David Black, and Sinphaltimus Exmortis. Music will be by Rev. Phat Man Dee, The Duke of Uke, Fat Free, DJ2B, and Lon DuQuette. It's like an X-Day Drill -- only indoors! "HARD CORE SLACK IN THE GREATEST METROPOLITAN HELLHOLE KNOWN TO MAN! SEE IT before it gets BLOWN OFF THE MAP!" -- Rev. Back It On Up, Hostess

This blasphemous, alcohol-soaked SubGenius event is practically within spitting distance of the sacred "Ground Zero"!

Directions and many more details are on the subgenius.com Events Page:

http://www.subgenius.com/newdevivals.html

(There you can also learn about the Nov. 13 Devival in Detroit and an event in Little Rock, Nov. 20… also, links to photo and video reports on the recent DEVOtional and other Cleveland events, 13X-Day Drill and Starwood 30.)

Updates to everything can always be found at the relatively new OFFICIAL SUBGENIUS FACEBOOK PAGE

***********

New Improved SubGenius Online Course at Maybe Logic Academy - starts Oct. 25, Bigger Than Ever

http://www.maybelogic.org/courses.htm

(scroll down)

To ENROLL:

http://www.maybelogic.org/enroll.htm

This online course offers two very different and distinct parts, running simultaneously for 6 weeks.

CULT CREATION AND MANAGEMENT is the interactive, participatory part, with several live chatrooms sessions each week. Students who want to create their own cults --- either funny or serious, or both -- work with Rev. Stang and each other to develop their ideas and bring them to life in the form of websites, publications, etc., just as The Church of the SubGenius did in its early days. By the end of the 6 weeks, industrious students will have developed their own proto-cult, ready for the market.

THE SECRET HISTORY OF THE CHURCH OF THE SUBGENIUS is a truly huge stash of downloadable multimedia, including practically everything created by The SubGenius Foundation and friends besides the three main SubGenius books that are still in print.

It includes a book's worth of brand new text, a DVD's worth of MP3 audio, another DVD's worth of AVI videos, and yet a third DVD's worth of graphics -- most of it available ONLY through this course.

This course has been running annually since 2006, and in that time Rev. Stang has scanned practically every page of every important Church publication (for instance, all of the STARK FIST OF REMOVAL zines), the most revealing letters from Church artists, writers and even celebrity weirdos, color versions of art pieces and comics previously seen only in B&W if at all, every newspaper or magazine article about the Church, every interview, all the way down to the yellow pads on which the Church doctrine was first outlined in 1977.

The audio on the MP3 files includes all of the SubGenius Media Barrage tapes, all of the BobSong music albums, all of the edited SubG convention, devival and X-Day Drill reports, early phone conversations between Stang and Drummond and other very early collaborators on the project, actual documentary recordings of the various insane people and kooks who have attempted to hijack the Church, dozens of the best Hour of Slack radio shows (and other SubG shows, like Puzzling Evidence and Susie the Floozie's) from each year, going back to 1985, and many sermons from live Church stage shows. It totals literally hundreds of hours of sound, representing 30 years of SubGenius media editing.

The videos, in DivX avi and/or mpeg1 format, comprise another 20 or more hours of multimedia: TV news show segments about the Church, animated and live SubGenius shorts, documentaries about the various X-Day Drills and devivals going back to 1980, music videos, interviews with SubGeniuses, even "anti-SubGenius" shows.

Each year, Stang has added more and more detail to the text history, so that it is now the equivalent of an entire new nonfiction book. As you might imagine, the real-life events that occur with a global group of weirdos and freaks like The Church of the SubGenius involve many stories that seem almost too bizarre to be real, as do many of the real characters that have become involved with the Church in one way or another during the last 3 decades. You'll get Stang's autobiographical accounts of everything from the very first beginnings of the SubGenius concept to the worst and most insane crackpots that it has attracted.

The multimedia stashes will be available throughout the 6 week duration of the course, as it would probably take almost that long just to download it all. For the price of the course, each student has access to materials that would otherwise cost hundreds of dollars to procure one at a time, as well as priceless materials that are available no other way.

The strange, inspiring and sometimes frightening anecdotes that Stang presents will prompt all manner of questions and observations about the nature of religion and philosophy, and these will be addressed in the frequent live chat discussions.

At the end of the course, the student will not only have a diploma, but his or her own brand-new self-invented cult and a complete multimedia library of practically everything worthwhile created in the name of "Bob" -- thousands of pages of text and graphics, and thousands of hours of audio and video.

******************

TOP SECRET

SUBGENIUS MINISTER'S EYES ONLY

NOT FOR PINKS

There is a secret Internet forum for True SubGenii on Google Groups, called ScrubGenius.

For decades -- since 1986 in fact -- alt.slack on Usenet was the main SubGenius forum. Unfortunately, because it was unmoderated, it acted also as a kind of "kook flypaper," and in recent years it gradually began to draw so many -- er, how to put this? Our formerly great newsgroup is now is about 75% what we might call unbelievers, Pink Boys, the Differently Saned, unfunny but overactive Bobbies, obsessive spurned fanboys, occultist ninnies who claim they're Dobbs or God, racist psychos and other "Bob"less paranoid PinKooks.

Our friend Rev. Tater Gumfries started a new Members Only forum on Google Groups. Any SubGenius can join, but anybody can be thrown out too. So, for the finest in kookery and kook-bashing, by all means see good old alt.slack. But for the unsullied SubGenius news, gossip and interaction, try:

http://groups.google.com/group/scrubgenius

You will have to join Google Groups -- most people probably already have -- which costs nothing, and you will then apply to join ScrubGenius. Give your "human name" -- the one you first ordered your Membership under -- and the latest Church Name and/or Internet Handle you are known by. One of the moderators (I, Stang am one) will get back to you and grant you access.

If you give this secret out to the UnSaved, you will be struck down by the REAL Stark Fist of Removal. That will happen anyway sooner or later, but don't risk making it happen sooner. "Bob's" Wrath -- you don't even want to know. He doesn't get a wrath-on very often, but it's awful to behold.

*************

THE HOUR OF SLACK on Several New Stations

The show has been picked up by new stations in North Carolina, Connecticut, Texas, and several Internet stations. The complete list is here:

http://subgenius.com/ts/hos.html

Almost all of the 1,280 episodes of the show are available for free download! The rich can subscribe and have CDs mailed to them biweekly:

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/audio-hos.htm

********************

YouTube Slack

There's some new SubGenius & DEVO related video at my YouTube channel, which leads to many other, more active SubGenius channels:

http://www.youtube.com/user/revstang

Another huge collection of SubGenius videos:

http://www.youtube.com/user/mcgrewrich

******************

FILTH!

SLAKCHAN -- New Sick Art and Photo Forum:

http://www.slackchan.org/bob/imgboard.php

NOT FOR KIDS

***************

YOUR CHANCE TO VOTE FOR THE MIRACLE "BOB" TOAST MAKER!

http://jesustoasters.com/

This fellow's toasters will miraculously burn an image of Jesus (or a hemp leaf, or peace sign) on bread… help make the next one a Dobbshead-burner! Scroll down to the survey. "Bob" is already ahead of Moses and Our Lady of Guadalupe, and swiftly gaining on Sarah Palin and Jerry Garcia! (Muhammad remains in the lead.)

Let There Be Slack.

See you sinners on the Saucers,

Rev. Ivan Stang

Sacred Scribe #273

13X-Day Drill, Starwood 30 Survived; Backed-Up Orders Filled

We are back in the SubGenius Foundation offices at the Slackermansion in Cleveland Heights, after two weeklong outdoor festivals in a row, plus days of packing and unpacking. Full reports on X-Day 13 and Starwood 30 will follow, but we want our beloved customers to know that all of the orders for books, ordainments, etc. that came in since June 29 have now been filled and the products are in the mail.

13X-Day is being called "the best X-Day Drill yet" by most of the attendees. Obviously, had the Xist saucers come and the Rupture happened, it would have been much better, but we're beginning to suspect that "Bob's" point may be that X-Day could happen AT ANY TIME - so you had better get Slack now. I know that I am happy with the hours of recordings I brought home, thanks to the great bands and ranters, and to Pater Nostril, who recorded it all. I will probably be combing through all that audio for the next ten Hours of Slack.

We are still editing our own photos, because we are very picky, but many other X-Day attendees have already posted theirs. You can find links to all of these various photo collections at Modemac's 13X-Day Facebook page:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Sherman-NY/X-Day-XIII-June-30-July-5-2010/10150127390070697

Many SubGenii have also posted their text reports on 13X-Day at the Members-only ScrubGenius group. Some are also posted on alt.slack, our older, unmoderated and kook-riddled forum. I will attempt to copy those reports and gather them in a 13X-Day section on subgenius.com soon. Anybody is welcome to email me their pictures, writings etc. if they want to be sure and see them archived for eternity at subgenius.com.

The Starwood Festival's 30th anniversary event was held at a new site, Wisteria, that is even prettier than Brushwood, and while attendance was down (as expected, considering the blow Starwood was dealt by its new competition), the event went beautifully. People are describing it as the most fun Starwood in several years. The devival, along with some great music by Rev. Phat Man Dee and others, will be heard on Hour of Slack in due time and possibly in multiple installments. We won't be posting quite as many photos from Starwood as from X-Day, because there was a lot more nudity (and more strangers and innocent bystanders).

We'll announce the links as soon as our big reports and photo galleries are done. Meanwhile, those who ordered SubGenius goods between June 29 and July 14 should be seeing the swag in their mailboxes by July 17 (or maybe a few days later for the overseas customers).

Praise "Bob," and praise all the SubGenii and other weirdos who made both the main SubGenius event and the USA's foremost neopagan festival such successes.

P.S. There is now an official SubGenius Foundation Facebook page:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Cleveland-Heights-OH/SubGenius-Foundation/124410604252009

NEW! - 13 X-Day Souvenir Propaganda Garments and Other Products

http://www.cafepress.com/subgen/188969

Better late than never. Wonderful souvenirs to cherish! -- Touching reminders of the last days of your life on planet Earth and your liberation by Dobbs. Shirts, hoodies, kids' clothes, mugs, steins, Liquid Frop Bottles, all emblazoned with the famous 13 X-Day posters by Rev. Pan Demonium and/or this year's antique bug porn "squirrel shot."

See our 13X-Day page for complete information on how to not die very soon.

STARK FIST Newsletter May 18 2010

This is your radio host and prayer partner Rev. Ivan Stang, posting here for the first time since last November. I have been Slacking off in the form of work, and have, with help, written a SubGenius movie. It might take a while to turn the script into a Hollywood-style movie, but in the meantime it should make for a damn good puppet show. We managed to get a few other projects done, though, like an official Church Facebook page and another Art Mine, with plenty more coming up, such as X-Day.

X-DAY THE 13th

The world ends July 5 at 7 a.m. That's why as many SubGeniuses as possible will gather at Brushwood Folklore Center in New York starting June 30, to party appropriately. There have been 14 X-Day Drills before this ultimate event, so we've had lots of practice. Our new X-Day page has all the details, as well as a new, improved way to surf through the nudity-packed photo essays on previous X-Day Drills, going back to 1996.

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/13XDay/13X-Day.html

1st SUBGENIUS DEVIVAL IN CHINA - May 22

Rev. Shining Path of Least Resistance, our man in Shanghai, is sponsoring a righteous SubGenius event behind the Iron Curtain. Dobbs only knows what will result. A billion new SubGeniuses, or a hundred years in the reeducation camps for Rev. Shining Path? You can fly to Shanghai today, or follow the results on our Events page.

http://www.subgenius.com/newdevivals.html

NEW TUNNEL EXCAVATED IN THE ART MINES

Braving the danger of cave-in and deadly gasses, we carved out another gallery of graphics deep under subgenius.com. ART MINES TUNNEL #25 now displays almost two years' worth of accumulated graphics, from the fine art of IMBJR and LeMur, and many others, to Proof of "Bob" unearthed from ancient magazine ads and startling artifacts from real SubGenius life. Caution: once you enter these galleries, days or even weeks may pass before you emerge.

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/Art_Mines_25/index.html

THE ALT.SLACK PROBLEM FORCES THE CHURCH ONTO FACEBOOK

Many SubGenii love to interact at arm's length over the Internet. They josh, share, and fight in several different forums. The oldest, alt.slack on Usenet and Google Groups, is a complete free-for-all. It cannot be moderated, and therefore undergoes periods when it fills up with kooks, trolls and the mentally ill, resembling a kind of perpetual flame war. Some SubGenii enjoy that sort of thing. I love it, but then I am a professional kookbasher. Others simply cannot tolerate the high levels of rancor, sarcasm, and personal insults.

I want to keep steering new SubGenii to alt.slack. For the newcomer alt.slack is a gauntlet, an ordeal, a trial by fire. It's not for sissies! On the other hand, we also need a forum that is kook-proofed, where the fighting and flooding doesn't interfere with Slackful communication. That forum was started up by our beloved friend Rev. Tater Gumfries (of Kern's Holler fame), and it is:

SCRUBGENIUS!

http://groups.google.com/group/scrubgenius

You'll notice that to access the ScrubGenius forum, one must sign in to Google Groups AND apply for membership by emailing Tater. Just about anybody will be let in, but if a person proves to be a bad apple they can be cast out of the garden -- unlike alt.slack. ScrubGenius can be a much more Slackful read than alt.slack because Pinks are culled from it. Anyone can sign up, and anyone can be banned. Some of the best SubGenius writers such as Rev. Susie the Floozy ONLY post to ScrubGenius.

Then there is Facebook. After my experience with MySpace -- being bombarded by requests from too many total strangers -- I tried to avoid "social media." Meanwhile, literally dozens of people, many not even SubGeniuses, started up "Church of the SubGenius" pages on Facebook. It finally sunk in that since ours is a face-based religion, Facebook is inevitable, so with the help of co-administrator and longtime SubGenius Foundation officer Rev. Nickie Deathchick, and with the guidance of "Bob" and Dr. Philo Drummond, we have started an "official, authorized" SubGenius Foundation Facebook page:

FACEBOOK SUBGENIUS

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Cleveland-Heights-OH/SubGenius-Foundation/124410604252009

or

http://tinyurl.com/subfacebook

This page has a discussion forum where Facebooking Subs can vent, a photos section where new artwork or Proof of "Bob" graphics can be posted, and a video section that can also take contributions. Crap posted by saboteurs can be removed. We will surely also add an area where MP3 audio can be posted. For folks who want to contribute to Hour of Slack or SubSITE, but who don't do the old Usenet approach, or email me directly, this is a good central gathering place to submit your works. Hopefully, this official Church Facebook page will become a whole "show" unto itself.

There is yet another SubGenius forum up and running at our IRC-chat host, TAPHOUSE. This is another potential True SubGenius forum from which false prophets can be cast, to make way for the true unburnished Word. It is not currently being used much, but ambitious schisms could make it their main hang-out.

http://taphouse.org/forum/

YOUTUBE SUBGENIUS

One can find hours of great and awful video by SubGenii by typing "subgenius" into the YouTube search window. But we suggest here some special channels by SubGenius old-timers. You can find plenty of links to new-timers in the old-timers' subscription and favorites lists.

Rev. McGrewich has gathered together a good cross-section of the best SubVids. He has also reposted many of the longer videos that I had originally put on Google Video.

http://www.youtube.com/user/mcgrewrich

ZONTAR RULES! This SubGenius picked up the CGI-Dobbs ball and ran with it. Surrealism at its most SubGenoid.

http://www.youtube.com/user/zontarnet

Puzzling Evidence, besides hosting the longest-running SubG radio show, has been documenting weirdness of every kind in the San Francisco area for 20 years. That documentation is now being heaved up onto the Internet, at long last.

http://www.youtube.com/user/PuzzlingEvidenceTV

Rev. Penn Jillette of Penn & Teller rants like 17 motherfuckers.

http://www.youtube.com/user/pennsays

You may be surprised by the subject matter of my own latest videos. I got a new hobby: wildlife photography. But not the kind you're thinking of.

http://www.youtube.com/user/revstang

Dr. Philo Drummond, co-subfounder of the Church, has been presenting SubGenius Film Festivals in the San Francisco area for some time. Here he offers some of his choice bulldada source material.

http://www.youtube.com/user/philodrummond

IMBJR SubG T-shirts

The great, if terribly perverted, SubGenius artist IMBJR has created some nifty new T-shirts carrying classic SubSlogans. Links to these (and several jillion other SubShirt sources) are on our main catalog T-shirt page.

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/tshirts.htm

INWO game almost gone

In 1997, Steve Jackson Games and the Church released a game called Illuminati New World Order - SubGenius. The game set includes 100 art cards by SubGenius arteests. However, it is officially out of print, and we possess the last 30 copies of this rarity. The price will go way up when we're down to the last 20 copies.

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/inwo.htm

BOOKS

Our three main books are our best product and the most crucial to SubGenius comprehension. Besides "Bob" himself, they are the main reason the Church exists. And yet, any of them could go permanently out of print at any time. Get 'em while they're extant. When you buy them from us, I, Stang, sign and date them.

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/books.htm

SUBRADIO: Hour of Slack, Susie archive, Philo archive, Puzzling Evidence

Thanks to advances in Internet cheapness, it is now possible to download SubGenius radio show episodes on MP3, going back to the 1980s. Almost all of the 1,200 past Hours of Slack are now available, as are Puzzling Evidence shows, Swinging Love Corpses concerts, and Rev. Susie the Floozy's "Bob's" Slacktime Fun House classics along with Lymph Node Institute ones. Also, there are constant streams of these shows that never ever stop. A person could drive itself completely insane. You can find links to all of it if you scroll down the Hour of Slack main page:

http://www.subgenius.com/ts/hos.html

ORDAINMENT

What keeps the Church financially afloat is Membership Ordainments. Ordainment is also the only thing that erases your Pinkness in the eyes of "Bob." The ordainment package is like a book that you can wear. Don't live your life as a Gimme-Bob. Be a REAL SubGenius Minister, a Reverend or Pope, registered in the Book of Life. Until you do that, you are still utterly Pink in the eyes of "Bob" and all true SubGenii. Pinks like to joke that you are MORE "SubGenius" if you don't contribute. That's fine, for Pinks.

ORDAINMENT: http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/membership.htm

The best mere $30 you will ever spend.

PRAISE THAT MAN "BOB" AND THE PIPE HE CLENCHES BETWIXT HIS SHINING HOLY TEETH.

SubGenius News - Pre-Xistlessnessmess 2009

Friends, we have many exciting announcements of upcoming events, products to spam for Xmas, personal news, and links to freebies that will keep you entertained for hours, especially if you are a sick, twisted, cynical or otherwise SubGeniusly individual. Events first, because some are coming up soon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nov. 21st-26th, Amsterdam, Holland:

Frop Cup 2009 - Frop Cup vs. Cannabis Cup

Opening ceremonies will be at Cafe Mono Bilderdijkstraat 15, 1052 NA Amsterdam, Netherlands at 22.00 (10pm) on No.. 21st and the week's festivities include: Rantings, Frop outtings, drunken staggering contests, SubGenius Olympic Doping Committee Meetings, Spankings (tm), Vile Dancing, SexHurt, The Korsakoff.

If you'd like to attend please drop Pope Black an email: pope_black666@yahoo.de

November 28, Detroit, Michigan:

ANNUAL DETROIT SUBGENIUS DEVIVAL

with THE AMINO ACIDS and many others

9:00 PM at SMALL'S BAR, Hamtramck, MI -- ALL AGES - $6!

http://theaminoacids.com/

Nov. 28, Dec. 5, 12, & 19, Chicago, IL:

Weekly SUBGENIUS DEVIVAL of the FITTEST

with Pope Michael Flores

8 p.m. each night weekly at THE LIAR'S CLUB, 1665 W Fullerton, Chicago IL

http://subgeniusslack.blogdrive.com/archive/78.html

Feb. 12 - 14 Atwood Lake Lodge, Dellroy OH:

Winterstar Symposium

With Rev. Ivan Stang, Witch Disco, Harvey Pekar (?)

http://www.rosencomet.com/festhapp.html

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sacred SubSpam: XISTLESSNESSMESS SALE!

A SALE at subgenius.com is a rare event. But, just for this holiday season, we refrained from raising our prices. Yes, after Xmas you'll never be able to get anything in our catalog so cheaply again. So hurry!

Not Yet ORDAINED?

SIGN UP NOW AND BE AN ORDAINED MINISTER! It only takes a minute and you'll get a huge 26-part package of stuff. These make GREAT Xmas gifts, especially for people who have never heard of The Church of the SubGenius! Perform marriages, funerals, circumcisions.

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/membership.htm

Some of our most popular items (like Book of the SubGenius) are already temporarily sold out, but our celebrated books Revelation X and The Psychlopaedia of Slack are still in stock (and all signed by Rev. Stang), as are all our DVDs, CDs, MP3-packed CDRs, even the SubGenius-Illuminati-NWO game box set and "Bob" condom packs.

Our main BULLDADA CATALOG includes those most sacred and in-demand goods:

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/mediashack.html

And there is another catalog with zillions of colorful SubGenius designs on T-shirts, mugs, clocks, thongs, hoodies, house wares, gifts, toys, posters, bumper stickers, stash-boxes, you name it, at THE SUBGENIUS STORE:

http://www.cafepress.com/subgen

For the SubGenius who has everything, The Official 2010 SubGenius Calendar is out! It's not especially cheap, but the paper it's printed on is slicker than snot on a doorknob:

http://www.cafepress.com/subgen.8404221

DobbsHead and the Wings of Slack designs are now both available on deluxe black hoodies from our pals at Anticonformity.

http://anticonformity.stores.yahoo.net/sujbdoheblho.html

http://anticonformity.stores.yahoo.net/nesuwofslblh.html

The great bulldada company Archie McPhee is now offering:

The J. R. "Bob" Dobbs Messenger Bag

This large, sturdy sacred stash bag features “Bob's" portrait on thick faux canvas and has adjustable nylon Big Black Straps! -- the kind men like.

http://www.mcphee.com/shop/products/J.R.-Bob-Dobbs-Messenger-Bag.html

+++++++++++++++

ONLINE FREEBIES FOR YOUR GAWKING AND GANDERING WONDERMENT

Portland Devival Videos and Report

Puzzling Evidence TV covered the spectacular SubGenius show in Portland last month, and it's all on YouTube. Links, stills, and a full write-up are at:

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/Portland_09/index.html

While we're at it, Rev. Stang's YouTube page is http://www.youtube.com/user/revstang

and a great SubGenius stash is at

http://www.youtube.com/user/mcgrewrich

We have a new favorite online magazine that has lately surpassed the old STARK FIST and even QUIJIBO in pure fun:

Kern's Holler Journal

This is Rev. Tater's ongoing compendium of the best rants, reports, poems and short stories by the top SubGenius writers and experts in The Forbidden Sciences. Includes some of the best of alt.slack by rip-snorters like Rev. Back It On Up, Rev. Stang, and good old Tater Gumfries hisself.

http://www.kernsholler.net/KernsHollerJournalOfScience/KernsHollerJournalOfScience.html

The Bob Belt

This is another of Tater's projects, and works with Google Earth. Go to this site and add to the list your fancy Church name and vague or fictional location (exact address not necessary!). Displays a graphic of Planet Earth with "pushpins" showing areas of concentration of SubGenius life: the "Bob" Belt. (Hint: Give this one extra time to load.)

http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?t=h&hl=en&ie=UTF8&vps=1&jsv=154c&oe=UTF8&msa=0&msid=110245893064340339403.000467c93e2919719f489

For a homey look at Rev. Stang's and Princess Wei's Halloween see:

Halloween at the Slackermansion

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics13/Halloween_2009/index.html

+++++

HOURS AND HOURS OF FREE SLACK

Hour of Slack Archives

NEW! - an ever-growing archive of hundreds of uncut Hour of Slack radio shows from the 1990s, copied from the original tapes to MP3, thanks to St. David Bachner:

http://db8.ca/radioarchive/hos/

"All SubGenius, all the time!"

NEW - "Bob's" Golden Stream Resurrected

Random SubGenius shows streamed 24-7 -- includes Hours of Slack (going back 20 years), Puzzling Evidence, "Bob's" Slack Time Funhouse, National Cynical, much more! From Rev. NeuroManson.

http://www.shoutcast.com/Internet-Radio/resurrected

Latest Hours of Slack and archive of shows from Con Year 2000 on:

http://www.subgenius.com/ts/hos.html

Home Subscription Hour of Slack CD mailings:

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/audio-hos.htm

LIVE SUBGENIUS CHAT

http://frop.taphouse.org:13013/chat.html

++++++

Good News About Rev. Magdalen's Child Custody Case!

FINALLY!

"As of October 4, 2009, the case has been dismissed and custody of Reverend Magdalen's son has been awarded to her. This appears to mean that after over three years of legal wrangling and over $100,000 in costs to her, Magdalen, her husband, and her ex-boyfriend are back to the status quo. That, plus she is still the only SubGenius officially banned from keeping SubGenius materials in her home, where her innocent son might accidentally come across them and become corrupted into the corrupt, obscene, decadent SubGenius cult that got his Mom into trouble in the first place."

From http://www.modemac.com/cgi-bin/wiki.pl/Reverend_Magdalen

++++++

Elect Dr. Hal for Congress 2010!

This will also lead you to the large Facebook realm of SubGeniuses.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=167120484239&ref=mf

+++++++

ALT.SLACK - AN ESPECIALLY WIGGLY WORLD

As always, for the most up-to-date daily SubGenius news and commentary on current events, as well as pages of insane ravings by actual kooks and hilarious mockings of them by expert kook-bashers, see the #1 SubGenius forum, alt.slack. Experienced geeks will want to use an actual newsreader program for this Usenet newsgroup, but the rest of us can use our plain browsers via:

http://groups.google.com/group/alt.slack/topics

At any given time on alt.slack, half the threads will concern flaming and kook-bashing that may only baffle newbies. Beginners are advised to look for thread subject titles that originate from known SubSources. It's like one big bizarre, messed-up, hilarious family, and the focus of SubGenius as a social phenomenon. However there are even more forums listed on our SubSITE News Page too:

http://www.subgenius.com/updates/updates.html

One last thing: times are tough, and the Church of the SubGenius could really use a donation!

To donate via Paypal:

http://www.subgenius.com/contact.htm

and The SubGenius Foundation is always happy to take a check at our Cleveland Heights sacred post office box!

PRAISE "BOB"; INHALE CONNIE!

SubGenius

PO Box 181417

Cleveland Heights OHIO 44118

SubGenius Foundation Report - Sept. 2009

The Stark Fist of Removal Online

Dear Friend,

Praise "Bob," and let us utter a resounding "WHEW." We at The SubGenius Foundation had a very busy summer, with numerous SubGenius devivals and outdoor festivals, and we're looking forward to spending more time in the office, finishing up numerous projects-in-progress. BUT! -- there is one last devival this year.

PORTLAND, OREGON Devival, October 10

This promises to be a classic old-time Devival, with guest preachers Dr. Hal, Rev. Ivan Stang, Dr. Philo Drummond, Princess Wei R. Doe and The Duke of Uke joining hosts Dr. Onan Canobite and Rev. Crawford Smith. (In other words, the main authors of the SubGenius books will almost all be in one place.) There are also three bands and Dobbs only knows what else. Address and lots more detail can be found at http://pdxdevival.com/

Past Devivals: Photo Galleries and Audio

We had big fun and recorded much audio and video at the recent DragonCon in Atlanta, DEVOtional in Cleveland and Starwood Festival in New York. Sermons, songs, and much much worse can be heard on current HOURS OF SLACK in MP3 (and possibly on your local station -- check the list at the link). Photos, and in some cases videos, from the various devivals and stage shows can be seen via links on our EVENTS page. CAREFUL: some of these photos are naughty and what might be considered 'NOT SAFE FOR WORK.' DVDs of some of our past shows can also be found in our video catalog.

Events page: http://www.subgenius.com/newdevivals.html

DragonCon: http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/DragonCon09/index.html

Hour of Slack downloads: http://www.subgenius.com/ts/hos.html

DEVOtional: http://subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/DEVOtional2009/index.html

Video catalog: http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/video.htm

12X-Day and Starwood photo essays:

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/12XDay/12X-Day_Text/index.html

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/STARWOOD29/index.html

Great New SubGenius Spin-Off Website: Kern's Holler Journal

This is an ongoing compendium from Rev. Tater Gumfries of the best articles and short stories by the top SubGenius writers and experts in The Forbidden Sciences. Very "down-home!" Don't miss it, and check in frequently for new stories: KERN'S HOLLER JOURNAL:

http://www.kernsholler.net/KernsHollerJournalOfScience/KernsHollerJournalOfScience.html

New Projects at SubGenius Foundation

We're getting tired of the Internet. It's been almost 20 years for some of us. The thrill is gone. We are back to working on books and movies. We intend to keep doing the weekly Hour of Slack for broadcast (and Internet) but are looking for a SubGenius with pay-website experience to help with subgenius.com. In the meantime, check out our main Internet forum:

Alt.slack

http://groups.google.com/group/alt.slack/topics

(It can also be reached with any Usenet browser if you have Usenet access.)

Alt.slack is the busiest online SubGenius meeting place by far. It is also the most kook-ridden, which makes for the finest in kook bashing by some of the top experts in that field. This is where to find links to several new SubGeniusly items of interest per day.

Best New SubGenius Products - Books, DVDs, Clothing

Our main BULLDADA CATALOG includes the latest of our 5 books. Did we mention that all books sold through our website are signed by Rev. Ivan Stang?

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/mediashack.html

And there is another catalog with zillions of colorful SubGenius designs on T-shirts, house wares, gifts, stash-boxes, you name it, at THE SUBGENIUS STORE:

http://www.cafepress.com/subgen

Not Yet ORDAINED?

It only takes a minute! SIGN UP NOW AND BE AN ORDAINED MINISTER! Perform marriages, funerals, circumcisions!

http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/membership.htm

12X-Day Photos & Etc. on SubSITE

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/12XDay/12X-Day_Photos/index.html

Galleries of photos by Stang & Doe, Dok Frop & Sister Decadence, Pater
Nostril, Agent Lloyd, Pisces, Misc (the Misc part is especially funny)
plus links to the Facebook ones that I've heard of so far, for people
on Facebook.

TEXT Reports (all gathered from alt.slack, but edited) are at:
http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/12XDay/12X-Day_Text/index.html

which is a SubSet of
http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/12XDay/12X-Day.html

Now, "Bob" has instructed me in a vision to assemble yet a THIRD 12X-
Day Hour of Slack and get it out of here by Saturday. The second one,
a "Bobtism" special, which we finished and mailed to stations
yesterday, will be linked into SubSITE on Thursday.

Any more photos, videos or recordings that are sent here won't be
gotten online until after we return from Starwood (which, being a week
of events within events, generates its own huge mass o' media). We/I
are trying to get a whale's butt's worth of work done before we leave.
This is an annual period of intensity that she and I keep voluntarily
putting ourselves through for some reason.

Oh wait, now I remember why. It's because the festival she runs comes
2 weeks after the festival I run. And her festival involves 1500
people. And she and I have to have the names, addresses and credit
card numbers of all those people right at our fingertips, starting
Sunday. But, by Saturday week I, the infamous disbeliever, will once
again be one of the 8 people who pretend to set afire instantly with
mere torches the artfully stacked, house-sized pile of wood. (The
ignition is actually triggered by remote control, by rocket
scientists.) Pissing off every fundie pagan in the campground on
account of me, a SubGenius, being involved in the Sacred Bonfire
Lighting is all the reward I need.

Also, I learned Ron Slabe will be projecting my Igazum-ation on a
giant screen during the pyrotechnics in the spectacular Friday night
island fire show. Knowing all those acid-gobblers are going WHOA DUDE
at my glorpy insta-psychedelia (when they're not looking at the
topless fire-twirling girls) always does my hideous hairy pride gland
good too.

But best of all, we won't be near a keyboard or computer for over a
week!

Unfortunately we will be closely surrounded by humans on all sides,
even when hiding out in The Medium Sized House or the various
SubGenius or SubGenius/Discordian camps. During Starwood, you have to
go pretty far out into the woods to escape the humans. Ask any bear.

SubGenius Online Course; New Videos; Magdalen & Other News

THE SUBGENIUS ONLINE COURSE
Monstro 8-week SubGenius Online Event!

April 6 - May 31:
Running Your Own Cult: Do's and Don'ts
and The Church of the SubGenius -- The First 30 Years
An ONLINE course from Maybe Logic Academy

You don't have to leave your home! Once signed up, you use your browser to access vast amounts of SubKnowledge in the form of text, videos, MP3s, online chats with Teacher Stang, and thousands of pages scanned from our old publications, comics, out-of-print books, etc.

Each year the how-tos and History of the Church materials get more layered and detailed. Last year's course ended up having twice as much material as the first year. This year we're adding even more. Describes and shows all of the most insane and/or fabulous things that happened in SubGeniusdom over the decades. Includes STARK FIST magazines of the previous century, letters from famous artists and monsters, sexy photos, and enough rare audio and videos from past events and radio shows to fill 3 DVDs. Yes, 3 DVDs of SUBSTUFF. It's like getting EVERYTHING the Church ever did (except for the 3 main published books) for one one-thousandth of the cost.

You'll also meet some VERY interesting people -- at a comfortable distance.

"So if you're debating with yourself over whether or not to join, punch your other self (the one who is arguing against it) in the face and get ready to shell out the money. This is a chance that only comes around once in a great year." -- former student Rev. Anna Dynamite

Course description:
http://www.maybelogic.org/stangcrs.htm
Enroll:
http://www.deepleafproductions.com/deepleafcart/
Maybe Logic Academy:
http://www.maybelogic.net/

---------

Free SubGenius Movies -- The Very Newest and the Very Oldest

Newest: SubGenius IGAZUM Cerebral Reformatter playlist:
http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=55B2042B110DCE54

If you are easily hypnotized, on strong antidepressants, or a chronic "chronic" user, set aside 40 minutes of time before you start into this, as it WILL mess you up one way or another.

A combination of interior-eyeball-scanned, mental projection-powered "animation" -- and past-landscape footage obtained through a randomly traveling time "camera" -- allowed us to create a composite music-video/brainwash code imbedder that will act as a replacement for recreational drugs. We used these techniques in six short videos about J. R. "Bob" Dobbs and the Church of the SubGenius. Animation and music are by Rev. Ivan Stang with sound collage editing and vocal craziness by LeMur, Norel Pref, Puzzling Evidence, Dr. Hal, Rev. Timothy Leary, Rev. Mark Mothersbaugh, and even J. R. "Bob" Dobbs.

If you have a really fast connection, we strongly recommend pushing the HD button at the lower right of the frame before starting each video. It makes a big difference.

My older videos (and my favorites, which are heavy on humor and animation) can be found at my YouTube site:
http://www.youtube.com/user/revstang

Our longer pieces are on Google Video. Newly added is my 1973 underground film:

"Let's Visit The World of the Future"
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7200374813151075996&hl=en

If you liked SubGenius Pamphlet #1 or THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS, you may find some surprising similarities in this old/future film, even though its discovery predates any SubGenius publications by 7 years. It is ". . . a travelogue inviting viewers of today to come visit the future."

This is the 45-minute "director's cut," restoring most of the bulldada that had been removed for the hippie "midnight movie" audiences of the 1970s, who could NOT handle it.

Another good YouTube playlist of SubGenius materials, the good AND the bad, is at Rev. McGrewrich's site:
http://www.youtube.com/user/mcgrewrich

--------------

Free "Infinitely Recursive Dobbshead" Windows Screensaver by Rev. Frank Force

We announced this in the last newsletter, but it has been greatly improved since then -- there's a new "psychedelic mode," and you can control the zoom rate of the infinite Dobbsheadery! And there's a new link to it, with samples:
http://slack.3d2k.com

-----------------------

Yet Another SubGenius Newsgroup!

GOOD READS SUBGENIUS
http://www.goodreads.com/group/show/1676.Subgenii

This literary-minded forum is in addition to alt.slack and the many other forums listed on SubSITE's NEWS page: http://www.subgenius.com/updates/updates.html

The most active and crazy one of all remains alt.slack:
http://groups.google.com/group/alt.slack/topics

---------------

UPCOMING EVENTS

July 1-5: X-Day XII at Brushwood, NY, USA and Amsterdam, Holland

This is the biggest annual SubGenius event! Not for the faint-hearted, although wimps are welcome.

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/12XDay/12X-Day.html

(WARNING: many 'adults-only' photos here!)

July 21 - 26: Starwood 29 at Brushwood, Sherman, NY

Although this is the largest "neo-pagan" event in the U.S., with amazing musical acts and speakers like St. Paul Krassner, it also includes a major Devival and other highly bulldada activities! I haven't missed one in 18 years. In fact I'm one of the organizers now.
http://rosencomet.com/starwood/index.html

September 4 - 7: DragonCon in Atlanta, Georgia

A HUGE SubGenius event unlike any other is planned for this, one of the grandest sci-fi/fantasy/comics conventions. Rev. Susie the Floozy, Priestess Pisces, The Quijibo Cartel, Yours Truly Rev. Stang and many other SubGenii will be staging a major Devival (with a Tesla Coil concert!), and will probably also have a sales table and be on some panels. Over 50,000 people attend this convention annually.
http://dragoncon.org/

Late September or early October: Kent, Ohio -- check our Events page: http://www.subgenius.com/newdevivals.html for details as they develop. This promises to harken back to the infamous Cleveland devivals of the 1990s.

October 9 - 11, Portland, Oregon: EsoZone 2009
http://www.esozone.com/

This is the second year of this fringe-science / psychedelics / 'magic' conference. The 2008 one featured Dennis McKenna, Antero Alli, Trevor Blake, Richard Metzger, Taylor Ellwood and Paul Laffoley. It sounds like an indoor Starwood. Princess Wei and I have been invited to be speakers / presenters / devivalists at the 2009 EsoZone, which apparently has a similar line-up of guests to the first one, along with several bands. Dr. Onan Canobite and Rev. Crawford Smith are deeply involved.

Their MySpace page: http://www.myspace.com/esozone

Boingboing on the '08 EsoZone:
http://boingboing.net/2008/10/07/esozone-this-weekend.html

A YouTube page:
http://www.youtube.com/user/esozone

November: Amsterdam Frop Cup?

New report on the 2008 Baltimore Devival:
http://clintjcl.wordpress.com/2009/01/31/journal-20081115-subgenius-baltimore-devival-2-2008-subgenius-balitmore-devival/
or
http://tinyurl.com/balt08

Text, photos, and movies from Rev. Clint. Very detailed. Some excellent cleavage photography too. Other coverage of this and ALL previous SubG shows can be found in our Devivals of Yore section:
http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/fun/devivals/devivals.html

------------------
THE BUTTHOLE SURFERS and "BOB"

Here is some interesting news from Rev. Joseph Daddy of Jesus, our Main Man in Amsterdam:

"I got The Butthole Surfers (the original 4) their Membership kits when they were doing their European Tour... they also took all of the SubGenius DVDs that I had, and ended up using Dobbsedeliasteses 1 & 2 for the backdrop on the rest of their tour. Paul Green from the School of Rock was also on tour with them, and he was a long time "Bob" fan, so he got his kit as well."

-------------

REV. MAGDALEN'S CHILD CUSTODY CASE

It's not all bad news, but it's still dragging on, and she still needs financial help. The details are here:
http://www.modemac.com/cgi-bin/wiki.pl/Reverend_Magdalen_Part_3

Direct donations can be sent via Paypal to: magdalen@subgenius.com

Direct donation to Magdalen's legal fund: http://tinyurl.com/jbpe8



-----------------

New Station Carrying HOUR OF SLACK in Florida

Saint Leo University, Saint Leo, FL
http://wslu.saintleo.edu/
Saint Leo University Radio, 100.1 FM & Campus TV Channel 96
Saturday Evening at 11 PM ET

Also, there is a change at

Dade City Community Radio in DADE CITY, FLORIDA (near Tampa) -- they moved from an FM frequency to 1610 AM, with Hour of Slack on Sundays 6 pm.

Podcast, free show downloads and complete list of all stations carrying SubGenius shows:
http://www.subgenius.com/ts/hos.html

---------------

ORDAIN YOURSELF OR A FRIEND
http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/membership.htm
NOTE: Posthumous ordainments are also available.

Even those who have become ordained ministers in the Church need the three major bibles of our religion. Of course, everyone already has THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS, but many SubGenii consider REVELATION X to be better, and the Third Testament, Psychlopaedia of Slack THE BOBLIOGRAPHON, to be better yet.

ALL BOOKS WE SELL ARE SIGNED AND DATED BY YOURS TRULY, REV. STANG.

SUBGENIUS BOOKS
http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/books.htm

Illiterates might be happier with our primary DVD, "ARISE!" There are several more recent SubGenius DVDs available as well. The great thing about our videos is that they are not copy-protected. When you buy one for yourself, it's like you are buying one for all your buddies as well.

SUBGENIUS VIDEOS
http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/video.htm

But the greatest gift of all, short of Salvation, is a subscription to THE HOUR OF SLACK so that every week for 6 months, you or your begifted one will receive the uncensored version of the same professional audio CDs that the radio stations get.

HOUR OF SLACK GIFT SUBSCRIPTION
http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/audio-hos.htm

Another good deal would be any of our MP3 stashes on CD-R. With one $15 purchase you can have up to 80 Hours of Slack, or mixed media barrages, music and devival recordings.

SUBGENIUS MP3 COLLECTIONS
http://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/mediashack.html

And of course there are hundreds of designs on shirts, hoodies, baby clothes, mugs, buttons, posters, mousepads, geegaws, etc., at our sprawling SubGenius Store on CafePress.

THE SUBGENIUS STORE
http://www.cafepress.com/subgen

Remember, friends: ANY and ALL SubGenius materials could suddenly VANISH at any moment. Indeed, many pray daily for that very thing to happen. DON'T BE A CHUMP! Get, while the getting's good. You already have all the Slack you'll ever have -- but only the Church can make it PLAIN to you! And we really enjoy doing that.

PRAISE "BOB"!

SUBGENIUS XMAS SALE ENDS THURSDAY

The holiday rush is on, but we can still take orders up until midnight, Thursday Dec. 18. It's the SubGenius holiday of Xistlessnessmess, during which we unshackle our factory workers and send them home for a couple of weeks. BUT! If you order a gift by late Thursday, it can go in the mail on Friday and you or your intended victim will have it by Xmas.

What if X-Day happened on Xistlessnessmess Day? It wouldn't be the first time vast numbers of humans were slaughtered by an Act of God on Dec. 25. You'd hate to see your loved ones go unordained and unsaved on that day just because you procrastinated, dragged your feet or were dead broke.

ORDAIN YOURSELF OR A FRIEND

Even those who have become ordained ministers in the Church need the three major bibles of our religion. Of course, everyone already has THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS, but many SubGenii consider REVELATION X to be better, and the Third Testament, Psychlopaedia of Slack THE BOBLIOGRAPHON, to be better yet.

ALL BOOKS WE SELL ARE SIGNED BY YOURS TRULY, REV. STANG. That has actually been true for years, but we thought this Xmas we'd actually MENTION that fact.

SUBGENIUS BOOKS


Illiterates might be happier with our primary DVD, ARISE! If you haven't seen the new improved version (updated 2005), you have not even LIVED. There are several more recent SubGenius DVDs available as well. The great thing about our videos is that they are not copy-protected. When you buy one for yourself, it's like you are buying one for all your buddies as well.

SUBGENIUS VIDEOS


But the greatest gift of all, short of Salvation, is a subscription to THE HOUR OF SLACK so that every week for 6 months, you or your begifted one will receive the uncensored version of the same professional audio CDs that the radio stations get.

HOUR OF SLACK GIFT SUBSCRIPTION


Another good deal would be any of our MP3 stashes on CD-R. With one $15 purchase you can have up to 80 Hours of Slack, or mixed media barrages, music and devival recordings.

SUBGENIUS MP3 COLLECTIONS

And of course there are hundreds of designs on shirts, hoodies, baby clothes, mugs, buttons, posters, mousepads, geegaws, etc., at our sprawling SubGenius Store on CafePress.

THE SUBGENIUS STORE

WE KNOW YOU ARE SUFFERING FINANCIALLY, now that the EconoCataclysm has arrived (just as "Bob" predicted in 1977!). We too feel the emptiness in your wallet. But your heart and brain need not go empty just because you are dead flat-ass broke. WE STILL OFFER FREEBIES GALORE on our website, latest of which is:

THE INFINITELY RECURSIVE DOBBSHEAD SCREEN SAVER
(Only for Windows PCs, sorry)
This intense visual hypnosis device was created by Rev. Frank Force and you can download it directly from him via:

RECURSIVE DOBBSHEAD SCREENSAVER

Of course, Hours of Slack are always available for free download, and this week we're offering our traditional SubGenius Christmas Rerun, an incredible barrage of over 70 different tracks, each of which takes a truly SICK or otherwise deranged bite out of the holidays. If the Christmas Carols that run incessantly and annoyingly on the Muzak speakers in your environment are about to drive you completely nuts, this show is the antidote. That's Hour of Slack #1183. The previous show, #1182, is also Christmas-y, albeit disrespectfully.

HOUR OF SLACK XMAS SPECIALS


Get those Xmas orders in by Thursday Dec. 18 and we'll have them all in the mail by Friday Dec. 19! If your order is a gift you want sent to someone else, simply put your friend's name and address in the "SHIPPING ADDRESS" box.

In the meantime, we at The SubGenius Foundation wish you and your pals an extremely Slackful holiday.